My birth story

Friday, April 22, 2005 I started this entry while I was in hospital...22nd April 2005It`s 6.30am on the first day of the rest of my life. A mere 12 hours ago the gorgeous bundle of arms and legs that is snoozing quietly next to me made his debut into the world and changed things for Daisuke and I forever. It wasn`t easy (more about that later) and I am in a whole heap of pain thanks to stitches which resulted from natural tears in unmentionable places during my 100% medication-free birth experience. However, last night Joey snuggled on my chest and slept as we waited in the recovery room and I was suddenly struck by an overwhelming realisation that THIS was what it was all about. The morning sickness, the heartburn, the lying awake at night worrying about him having two heads and both of them having to be born through an area, which let`s face it, no matter how much they tell you it will stretch, just doesn`t seem big enough!My childbirth experience (woo hoo, 18 hours of pain, one baby later and I am already “experienced”, if only keeping up with the cool gang at school had been this easy!) was (is) intensely painful, horrifying, humiliating but as almost everyone who has given birth says, totally worth it. (Although despite what everyone says, it isn`t instantly forgotten when you hold the baby, I couldn`t sleep last night because of the constant flashbacks.) But it was also empowering, amazing and indescribably wonderful. Seeing the look of love on Daisuke`s face as I screamed and pushed his son into the world was an amazing feeling, as was watching him bond with the baby we had both been looking forward to meeting since the blue line first appeared on the pregnancy test. I also realised what it is like to have a real dream come true. I have achieved a lot of things in my life that I am proud of but now I know what it feels like to have the one thing I always wanted. I am terrified of messing it up, of being a bad Mum, of not living up to the expectations of those around me but last night when me moved into our room and I was holding the baby and he was staring up at me as if to say “Mum, you`ve got a surprisingly large amount of nose hair..”, I had an overwhelming feeling of “it will all be ok.)So, My birth story…Bear in mind that I had three predictions when I found out I was pregnant. 1) The baby was a girl. 2) He/she would be born at least one week late and 3) He/she would weigh at least 4 kgs. I was wrong on all three accounts so I have decided to ignore my “women`s intuition” from now on! LOL! I had a tough pregnancy, especially with the morning sickness but in a way, I think my body was trying to get itself into a good condition so that the baby would be born safe and sound. For some reason I was never particularly worried about the birth itself as I figured my body had carried me through my pregnancy safely, I could trust it to get me the rest of the way. I think my relaxed attitude towards it all might have helped during the actual birth process.. Friday, April 22, 2005 Labour?I felt some random pains as the clock struck midnight on my due date but went to sleep as I assumed it was nothing. I woke up at about 2.30am with what can only be described as excruciating period like pains ( excruciating is a good work- although I didn`t realise its TRUE meaning until later that day..) The pains were coming and going but I didn`t think too much of it as I thought contractions would hurt more/ in a different way. As it happens, they started coming about every 15 mins, then every 10 minutes. I dozed on and off in between the waves of pain. In between pains I would feel completely fine so I realised that the chances of me being in labour were high. I finally woke Daisuke up at 6am and told him he would probably have to take the day off work. He was incredibly surprised. We called the hospital and they said to come in at 8.30 to get examined. We also called Jenn, Daisuke`s Mum and my family. I then went to have a shower and tried to finish packing my hospital bag. At the hospital I was examined, put on a foetal montor and then the doctor sent me home as I was only dilated a couple of cms and she said that although the baby would be born that day, I still had a way to go and relaxing at home would probably be better than trying to chill out at the hospital. Daisuke went off to work for a few hours to put things in order and Jenn and I went to Mister Donuts! ;-) I had about 5 contractions in the 30mins we were there and kept having to go to the bathroom as I didn`t want to cry out in pain in front of all the Japanese people. They must have thought there was something seriously wrong with me. We then went to rent a video and got Bridget Jones` Diary. We spent the rest of the morning hanging out at Jenn`s house and at lunchtime Daisuke`s Mum joined us, then Daisuke came back from work, having been sent home by the Deputy Principal. He figured that as the doctor had said I wouldn`t give birth until the evening, he could do the home visits he was scheduled to do and then come and be with me at around 3pm. The Deputy Principal told him not to be so ridiculous and sent him on his way! It was quite a good job that he did though…My contractions got closer together as we watched the film. Jenn was the trusty timekeeper, Daisuke did a sterling job of rubbing my back when the pain hit and Daisuke`s Mum provided the refreshments.. When the film finished we decided to go to the hospital as my contractions were starting to hurt a lot more and I was feeling nauseous. I think it was about 2/3pm by this point. When we got to the hospital they examined me again and I was still only 3/4cms dilated but the doctor admitted me and things went really quickly from there. Apparently the fact that I was feeling sick was a sign that hard labour was on its way so it was a good job we went to the hospital when we did. The labour itself is a blur of pain and ickiness. I remember at one point wondering what on earth I was thinking when I decided on the “no drugs” option and at another point wondering if the pain would ever end. I had amazing support though. Daisuke was great and I can only express the deep gratitude I have for Jenn for being with me throughout the whole thing (right up until the pushing started). Daisuke`s Mum was also there and between the three of them, they kept me breathing and my mind off the pain! According to Jenn I actually stopped breathing at one point because of the pain and all three of them (and the midwife) were trying to encourage me to breath by doing it themselves. All I remember is that there was suddenly a breath of fresh air on my face and it felt really good!! ;-) The other thing I remember is really needing to go to the bathroom and sitting there on the toilet thinking that this would be a really good place to give birth because the pain didn`t feel so bad in that position! After I finished in the bathroom, the midwife checked me and I was 8/9cms dilated which surprised everyone and there was a sudden flurry of activity as they prepared me to deliver. Jenn and Daisuke`s Mum left the room at this point and they made Daisuke put on a gown. Pushing the baby out was the hardest thing I have ever done and it was a blur of pain. It also felt like a really long time but it was only about 25 minutes in reality. (Jenn timed the whole thing!) I also only pushed three times in total before Joey came out. I always used to joke about being born with childbearing hips and how the doctor would need a baseball mitt to catch the baby as he/she came flying out. It wasn’t quite like that but in a way, it was less painful than I expected. I just kept my mind focussed on the fact that any minute now I would get to see him and check he was ok. As the time came closer for him to come out, the midwives kept telling me to open my eyes but for some reason I was so busy concentrating, I didn`t want to open them. Before I knew it, Joey had arrived and I felt a huge wave of relief flood over me as I heard him crying. They cut the cord and then put him on my chest for a little while. Then they took him to clean him up/ weigh him etc.. while the doctor cleaned me up/ did the stitches etc.. The placenta must have been delivered at some point but I didn`t feel a thing. The clinic had a massive screen over the bed where you could see the baby being cleaned up etc.. which was very cool. Daisuke went over to where the baby was to take pictures etc.. and at one point stuck his face in front of the camera so all I could see was his big grinning face which made me laugh out loud. The doctor was trying to stitch me up at this point so she wasn`t very impressed by my giggling! They brought Joey back to me and we had some fun putting him to my breast and feeding him and everyone got to hold him. I had to remain flat on my back for a couple of hours so it was great to have everyone there to keep me company. I was actually in the recovery room for five hours in total (usually you are there for 2/3) because the woman in the room next door had to have an emergency C-section so they decided not to move me to my room until that was finished as it was easier to check up on me in the recovery room. Everyone left around 11pm and I was moved to my room about an hour later. I feel really lucky to have had such a trouble-free delivery. I have had problems since with breastfeeding/ mastitis and a mild case of the baby blues but I still consider myself blessed to have this beautiful baby boy. I was also lucky enough to have my favourite midwife there for the delivery. She was on the day shift so if I had given birth any later, she wouldn`t have been there but as it was, she was there the whole time and even stayed late to help me breast-feed. She reminds me a lot of one of my favourite aunts and it was somewhat comforting to have her there as a result. So I guess that it my birth story. If you made it this far, thanks for reading!! ;-)