10/13/2006
It`s oh so quiet...
I think I might be in heaven. It is 7pm and both my husband and son are asleep. Yes, I am unimpressed that yet again my husband has done bugger all since coming back from work but I am just going to count my blessings, prepare my classes for tomorrow and get an early night!! There is also of course no guarantee that Joey will sleep all night but as he only had a 20 minute nap at midday today, there is a high chance that he will sleep through. (Touch wood)
Joey has been getting into a nice sleep pattern lately, he is usually in bed between 8-9pm which is a BIG improvement on the 10-11 pm pattern he had gotten into before. The only problem is that he now wakes up between 6-7am so the hour or so of "mummy time" I had after Daisuke left and Joey woke up has disappeared which has left me a little cranky. However, I may be cranky but I am not as desperately tired as I was! (Although I am not counting the past 10 days or so of ilness etc.. because they have been a sleep deprived visit to hell!) He is also falling asleep by himself which is a big change.
Daisuke said that the head of the Prefectural BOE is coming to his school on Monday. This is a very rare thing so it is likely that he has a BIG announcement to make about the future of the school. D`s school has a rapidly decreasing number of students as it is way out in the middle of nowhere so anyone who can get into a school in the city goes there instead. The level of his students is quite low as well and there are lots of disciplinary problems. There are many rumours going round as to what will happen to the school and it sounds like everyone will know for sure on Monday. What happens to the school could have a huge bearing on what happens to us next year. D isn`t due for a transfer for another 18 months but if the school is listed to close/ merge with another school, the chances of him being sent somewhere else is high. (For those of you not aware of the Japanese education system, teachers here are government employees and are unable to choose where they work, they are moved around every 5-7 years to random places (usually not ones they request) and familes are usually expected to follow) I am not really sure what my next move will be if he does get forced to transfer early. I have three options, a)go with him with wherever they send him, b)stay here in the city with Joey or c)bring forward my vague plan to try a move home to the UK. (thereby making more than a vague plan!)
For those of you gasping "OMG! I can`t believe she would let her husband move off while she stays in the city, what a selfish b*tch" I should explain that "tanshinfunin" (where a husband and wife live apart due to his job transfer) is pretty normal and acceptable in Japan. (I personally think that the relatively low divorce rate is partly due to the "tanshinfunin" system!! )Seriously though, nobody would really blink an eye if I chose to stay in the city as it makes more sense to me than moving. I have my students and my friends and it is very unlikely that I would have the same kind of contentment in another part of the prefecture. There is a HIGH chance that D will be sent to one of the semi-sub-tropical islands to the south of Kagoshima (near Okinawa) which would be nice for a month or so but after a while I would probably go crazy as I have become accustomed to being to get my hands of the majority of Western things I like! More than that though, they have MASSIVE insects on the islands and the teacher housing is notoriously old and dirty and I would spend the whole time wishing we were back in our lovely apartment in the city! I would be miserable and I know it is harsh but I want to avoid the whole thing if possible!!! (although there are days when I think having a beautiful blue ocean on my doorstep would be cool!)
I guess I shouldn`t worry about it too much as he might not even get transferred this April anyway.. but it is the uncertainty that bugs the hell out of me!!!
Anyway, I guess it is time for me to get back to work on preparing my classes.. sorry for this boring "thinking out loud" blog entry..
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6 comments:
Hallo and hope you enjoy your weekend from England!
Popped by from Michele's.
Oh My! I so understand the not knowing part!
I can totally understand staying in the city. Would he be able to travel home often to see the two of you? Is there a chance of returning to the UK with your family?!
Ahh the future always foggy eh? Life would be boring otherwise (or so they tell me!)
You're absolutely right. It's very common in Japan to live apart due to the husbands job. I don't think anything's wrong with it either.
My friend Rumi is going to be going through that in February. Her husband is being transferred to the opposite end of Tokyo. Hours upon hours away, so commuting daily isn't an option. And they own a house here already, they don't want to sell it, since his move is just *temporary* and plus she has 3 kids and they love their schools and don't really want to uproot everything for a temporary move. So Rumi and the kids are staying here. It's just more practical for them and very understandable.
About you and Joey. I think like you said, you like living where you do. You got access to many foreign goodies. You live in a beautiful apartment. Your friends and support system is there. Of course you'll miss D though. This is a tough one.
It's the unknown and uncertainty that is the nail biter. At least if you knew, you could get into action or think of the pros and cons of it all.
Thinking about you guys and hope all is good news on Monday! : )
I'd be very jealous if you moved down to an island.
Sure you wouldn't have Cadbury chocolate on hand... but what a life!
And after a few years you come back to the city and re-live it all like never before.
See, I also think Miklos has brought up an excellent point as well! Living the island life, could be awesome too and you'd be with D! Oh man....decisions decisions. Ha ha ha!
For me personally, I'd go with my hubs. But then, I'd be lost without my hubs and he'd be lost without me. Yes, we really are dorks! Ha! : )
But like I was saying...I do not see anything wrong with a wife wanting to stay and not go either! Darn this is a tough one. I'll be thinking about you! Please keep us updated about this if you can! : )
Hi Midori, AnneMarie in Kumamoto (Crann Amhain on Flickr). My dh is also a high school maths teacher so I know all the angst about the transfer season! My sympathies. He is from the city but spent the first 10 years or so doing his time out in the "outer blocks" - Minamata, Hitoyoshi. We built a house near the airport and he then got transferred to a city school. He has a tough commute, but he says he doesn't mind it so much 'cause he likes 'coming home.' .
I reckon that if he did get transferred to a non-communtable area, I'd stay here. I was not happy at all in the place we lived in after getting married. I couldn't imagine leaving this house to live in a school flat, and having to start again with new students, new place etc.
I hope that if your dh does get transferred, that it is to an accesible school.
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